On the fragility of certain media.

Seems like the proper act of folding, in its multiple facets, is a critical skill in need of absolute mastery for one’s success in maintaining personal welfare. Some situations/scenarios in which ‘folding’ can be important:

  • Culinary expertise/in the prevention of general Food Spillage Potential (FSP): folding whipped cream with melted chocolate and cream cheese—How else does one engage the tactile pleasures of the tongue without bringing forth the inherent fluffiness of milky foams?; folding egg whites into any dish requiring egg whites; folding omelets, crêpes, burritos, wrap extremities (crucial, absolutely crucial—vital w/r/t FSP); folding dumpling wrappers, nori, lettuce wraps (difficult, yet trendy).
  • Social conventions/in one’s attempt to culturally impress one’s peers: folding paper napkins; folding cloth napkins upon the legs; folding paper towels into make-believe napkins in the event of legitimate napkin shortages; origami; folding monetary bills in attempts at forming pareidoliac (pareidolic?) imagery of genitalia and/or drug paraphernalia; folding disposable chopstick wrappers into chopstick rests.
  • Miscellaneous lyfe skillz: folding business envelopes and business letters, always into thirds (forchristssake: always into thirds); folding of congratulatory letters or well-wishing stationery s.t. maximum effect is achieved upon opening by a potentially depressed/ill/newly married/parenting/birthday-celebrating party; folding clothes along seams, minimizing wrinkles; folding laundry while it is still warm; folding deck chairs/sofa-beds without simultaneously amputating fingers (particularly difficult); folding gift wrap for efficient translucent tape application along dangerously conspicuous uneven edges; the process of multiplication.

    Learn them.